so many things i want to say

today i pray

that these ways i let myself decay

lead me astray

so that i might be okay

live and let learn in love

with lucrative lines

i let lift me higher into what's above

do you remember when i spoke in threes?

i maybe meant shallow things then

maybe mean it all again

once again

shorter

but

am i a man?

i'm not the same

it's not just a game

it's making more sense

with all the passing moments

all the passing riddles and rhymes

i'm coming to terms with all we left beneath

i'm coming to fall in love with all i left here beneath

i'm coming to terms with the world

i'm coming to terms with myself

i'm coming to terms

i'm coming to

i'm coming

i'm

here

i'm

there

i'm

fucking

everywhere

verywhere

erywhere

rywhere

ywhere

where

here

ere

re

e

It moves in vast bursts

Sweeping across the surface

Brushing aside the memories

I lied down to rest

I lied down to rest

I rose to fight a war

I ripped apart the trees and the bark

Ripped apart the world

My own consolation rests

Bend the fence

Burn the wall

Break the boundaries

This is all I asked for

I turn the dial twice over

And once more again

Light flickers like fireflies

Like firefights

Like the wars we held high and fast

Vast over the field

Walk between the rows

The cold pews where your fury grows

Facetious, fastidious, fasting for future development

Rush it right

Turning left

Living like it’s all something

To some girl

To save your flesh

To tell your tales and take them down

I lied down to rest

I lied down to rest

I lied down to lie to the world

I lied down to tell a tale

To sell a pale moon to a star eyed fool

One minute to move

One minute to make it mean more

The breezes blowing in and over

The holes I left in the flat earth

The holes I left in the hollow ground

The holes I left in your head

Speak it so it can roll down

Ride on in between

The blades holding high in the wind

Bending at the waist

Speak it

So I can hear it

So I can hold it

High above the world

heavy mids

mindset to follow the expiration

moving in an arched beat

held to your rusted rhythms

let me love like lusted words

i lost in the backlit cacophony

i'm still wading around in the wake

i'm still here

you're still right there

It’s pavement and celestial outbreak

Cued up for the spotlight

Baring your existence beneath the rain

Baring your impression beneath your hands

It’s a lie from the lips

Of the immortal and the man

minute and miniature

trying to be a child and a voice

emotions amplified

motionless at best

moving in circles in fear of the plague

and the vermin that sits

closing movement

cascade and tear down the paraded walls

trying to be stronger than the fall

it's all what you took for granted

down to the very base of the hall

bloodlet and leeched

sick of being preached

sick of the fascination with my

own determination

to fix everything i can reach

sick of the garden and the hellfire and the stone

sick of the child of perdition i birthed

from my own beaded eyes

reptilian and predatory in disguise

demise

fixable lies

littered and left and lingering on the likened branch

ate your soul

whole

meant for more than the whoring thoughts

music means less and less than where i was

when i was motionless at best

the night life rhythm talking to itself

in acidic trip dreams

your psychotics and depressants

your self assured regression

hello recession

i'm here for you to take me

my head holds high

works in this machine

simply part of the mechanism

the river, the ravine

nuclear powered and water propelled

tell me what i already know

tell me what i want to forget

tell me the stories

we once wrote out in the sky

carved into the face of the stars

with bloody fists

and glowing eyes

did you ever find yourself

over the bridge between here

and the hell between the bookshelves

smoking like love

loving like smoke

burning like paralysis

crescendo into atmosphere

you're nothing here

but molecular fascination

but consecutive frustration

you're a fixation

and a blatant disregard for all the laws

i set in place

to break against the face

of authoritarian adolescence

wake up wake up

w a k e u p y o u ' r e a n um b e r a n d a t i m e

somewhere here in my head

somewhere here far from my base

somewhere i can hide

somewhere i am more than these lights

brand your mind

tell me something

with my held up time

i sit in line

and question these things

but i never decide

should in the end i survive

remember that i

was the one that swallowed

my existence in line

i pray for these streets to flood

with all my worries and all my blood

and all the things that weigh me down

and all the noise and all the sound

it's like rivets to my head

i'm chippin away at myself again

to fall into the pressured tank

is to fall into hell

should i decide

these lines

these things

these i did to survive

should in find crucify me

i will live not in the fear of my eternal god

instead in the embrace of my inner child

my inner wild

my inner hell and heaven

sex and love

dirty fucking midnight

made to be more

than the cheap liquor holding open my door

come in and learn to love me

like an addiction

to a predilection

for destruction

learn to fall into the pattern

the swallowing months

and swelling heat of a non-existence

livin in the dark age

ragin across the river i carved out your eyes

lyin like love running down my chin

from my lips to my chest

to the rest of bodiless soul

light dries up to become colder with sleepin dreams

the ocean's alive

the ocean's alive

the ocean's in my eyes and i see so much more

than what we planned to ask for

planned to grasp for

planned to be the architect of you dreams and all your lies

livin the dark age

i'm dryin beneath the moon

i'm dyin beneath your noon

i'm lyin down to drink in the temple

to sink in beneath it

to fall harder like the blood comin

from your cracked skull

i see these things

i feel these wings

i am so beneath

the capacity of aquatic comprehension

i am the plague

i am the antidote

i am your best friend

i am everything

biding my time

like city lights in my twirling eyes

finalize and recognize that these

words are made to compromise

the weakness i hold at our base

i face my fears and hold dear to my own flesh

wear it like it actually belongs to me

find myself questioning the stability

and reality and reliability of my own deciding eyes

these ties that bind

these things that blind

these torn up lies

i'm livin it up fast

fuck my past

and rockin out like it's my last

night in town

like i'm fucking rick james

and hemingway

in some twist of anger sex frustration and love

holding fast to my moral foundation

and holding faster to the flood i find

breaking these binds

removing these blinds

impact gun

the choir sings

fallen bits of all your memories

the shattered eyes

i didn't have a chance to recognize

don't talk that way

it was all just a mistake

how can you question this world

without me in your way

hardcase headache

you're driving me mad with light

i sleep in circles and talk in time

you should stay here tonight

bellowing sky

i hear the crack fall deep

alternate between

your days and your sleep

pages tear from hazy eyes

you're a child without a voice

the coast rises in time

it's a rhythm without noise

hardcase headache

you're driving me mad with light

i sleep in circles and talk in time

you should stay here tonight

if i'm not alright, i'll stay outside

with the fire and the sky

baby sing your lullaby

i promise it'll all be fine

if i was awake to tell you goodbye

the quake wouldn't settle less

if i was away when you decided fly

i'm sure that it'd still be a mess

i'm not the right man

i'm not the right man

i'm speaking just to stand

so stay here tonight

everything shifts

feel the emotion run

and fall off my skin

like sweat/blood/tears

consumed by the fears of indecision

left here to stand as guard

left here as bait

left here to drive the flood

back faster and faster

till the shoreline's past her

and into the water's edge along my eyes

call it in and fire up and upon it

the gritting

the gripping

the fits and the ranting

psychotic shots to your neck

eat your poison

eat your cure

eat your heart/mind/soul

eat yourself

wake up and walk amongst the dead

walking in the iris of the hollow

i am delivered

i am saved

i am salvaged and depraved

left behind to look

into your crumbling mirrors

held by handles at arms length

held by handles to keep

the heat off your face

let it run up your veins

like God and division

i'm asking to be taken

to be forsaken and forgiven

exiled and excommunicated

eradicated and loved

loved like religion and angry truths

the extremes i chose to live in

the seeds i chose to swallow

hoping to grow a tree from within

up and out of my skin

maybe i'll make some sense

when the time passes

when the sun sets

and i'm walking in between everything

the strings and words on the map

taken aback

taken back

torn and slack

you're holding onto the river

you're holding back

you're carving out your island

you're fucked

but you're free

and nothing is more powerful than that

subaqueous

i shallowly whisper

watching the stars come down from my ceiling

lost in the reflection on the walls

losing grip of either this reality or that

breathe in with touching lips

inhale the perfumed exietence

beneath the water, my breathless kiss

drowning fast in this moment

i drop myself off in the dark

wading waters

drinking in psychotic paralysis

i hear my name

it's not the same

can i be better than the design?

and yet another

but i can try

reside inside my head

her voice is echoing

silencing the ill spoken

and the darker plague

i am to be here

days move in waves

breaking the ceramic cast

fuck the haze

just want your lips to last

taking apart the need to breathe

and burning like sunlight

from the setting that's passed

i feel my eyes sew up

uncut

practical practicing

fracturing the rhymes

running on the ceiling

revealing itself

like lily white adjectives

made to be cognitive

something's wrong with it

burning backwards like statues in Moscow

totalitarian

scary and better than

the natural feelings of imprisonment

saved face

taken at a more solid pace

i'm waking up backwards

into the revisions of peace

i prepared for practical measures

made up my mind

to make believe

in all the things

i said i could never give in to

fear nothing

walking streets in dark shrouds

speaking like clouds

soft and heavy with rain

it fears itself

spoken in idiotic wars

waves its gun in the face

of my cellular destruction

i am not to be the deity

you fell back on in the

darker hours of the eclipse

i am simply memories and melodies

and all the expendabilities

of the fury that doused itself

in fire and gasoline

living somewhere left between

the place i slept in the music

and the more beautiful mosaic

take it, wear and break it past acidic

tell this to taciturn statues

and granite lights

tell it like tales and lies

falling from rained out skies

in what we left after the wars

of worlds and words

and whirling hells held high

over your own smiles

and mile long lies of envy and sin

burn it to twisted sticks and tinder

the tender words i blew up

in the succession of a process

speak of this when i'm past gone

and taken along the rivers and shores

unsure of the life and the death

that dug itself deeper than the parasitic

dreams and the schemes

and the scenes and the fiends

and the fiction you wrote

out of your subconcious diction

just to make this life be more

than blank canvas

remember who ran this into the ground

remember who wrote this without a sound

and write this out

in syllables for the blind

and the burning

somewhere lost

like apologies beneath me

i'm like lip locked dropped

and running for cover

from the love burning

and running up out of the hands

of an all too human god

misquote the misdirection

feed off these imperfections

eat me alive and treat me right

i'm like burning skulls in your eyes

in the end

i'm burning this to the ground

to reap something new out of the ashes

Written at roughly 2 am during a storm

there're worlds buried beneath

sand and lightning

there i lie my words to rest

in the fury of the storm

i watch you move silently

between claps of thunder

i watch you move between the rain

i watch you move with lightning in your eyes

and fire in your skin

this backlit world i made

with carved stone and burning lights

here i lie my words to rest

here i lie with my heart in my hand

to pump this place full of life

and the audacity i held

like sand on a shore

whispers worded in

the way she moves

her fingers along my skin

i'm walking in darker lights

passing idioms & pillars of foundation

they're inconsequential

as i move forward

captivated by the burning star before me

moving between strings

and speaking in softer lyrics

climbing over stars in fuller skies

climbing out of myself

and trying to be better

than the shadow i was before

i'm drowning in your eyes

i'm intoxicated from the million kisses

i left marked on your skin

i fall in a curled motion

twisting like smoke against the night

moving with the pacing beat of my heart

i see you

standing in shy light

burning up like music and motion

burning up like abrasive stars

and i'm enveloped

wrapped up and lost

the water laps onto the shore

it's the edge of my mind

the end of my dreams

i'm waiting for simple things

i found you while blindfolded and mute

i found you without looking

playing my piano of wicker and light

and rusted fire

i'm waking up in colored mists

drinking in confusion like blood out of air

is today the day the world ends?

or tomorrow do i reap your reckoning?

wondering when and again

and where is this answer to the fatal question

strain your voice

and whisper the words once more

i'm falling in love with the world

i'm begging you stay

my head's spinning in technicolor fusion

moving in rapid motion

i feel like lightning without thunder

like wind without rain

i am growing out of the ground

like a vacuum pulling the earth in

i am nothing, but everything left behind

that drew itself out like love from dustless ash

my nostrils flare

eyes widen

enveloped by everything

i'm feeding off the light

your eyes are radiating in darkness

the cylinders of cigarettes and solar systems

the carving tools that dig into me

i'm watching you watch me

dissect me

learn me

love me

i'm watching the darkness fall around your shoulders

in the pale fall of the curtain

in the augmented swell of the sound

i'm watching my heart break and brace

rebuild and reverberate to a solidarity of truth

i love

furiously

and without compromise

inspired by drying screens

painting in obscenities and curse words

in need of an exorcism, i see you raise your hands

drop your eyes

beg for the cross again

signing away the boiling days

to raise mountains in heated ways

purple carved faces

i'm falling in love with these ideas

and falling backwards out of my head

Stary eyed heat rises

clouding layers of skies

i imagined these lies

so that i might be occupied

pulling bricks out of the clapboard

and rebuilding the wall

rebuild the wall

to watch it all come down

and up again and again

free form factuality

fuck my fractionality

my indifference and inexistence

i am the legend of persistence

i'm the common thief

and the calling card and the mask

the dying needle on the wax

take it past and back

who's the fool

while i'm droppin bombs on hatchmarked lands

it's the fool who rules

holding back pools of poetry

comin out your muther fuckin eyes

takin down the wall paper

and putting up sandpaper

turning this from room to sunlight

mark it up and take it down

break it down

bury it deep

underground

this lines

are

getting

shorter

but in the light of progression, your aggression is feeding something like lion nightmares

argumentative

and debatable

takin down this room

and i'm building more soon

but for now i'm ripping it down

and painting smiles on the summer sidewalk

waiting for the beauty to break out my chest

and love to kiss me softly in the summer air

i love these lights

licking the sky in furious inertia

logical progression of pressure on my skin

caress in the dark

i'm letting my walls fall apart

learning to love in hesitant swings

of a cracked and pressured pendulum

decadent looks from lusty eyes

my pace in strides

i'm rising higher in deeper struggles

fighting to touch clouds

fighting to mean more

fighting to fight to find blood on my knuckles

fuck it in the end i meant to raise the dead

i'm hearing these voices outside my head

i'm hearing your soul

and so far it's drowned out your voice

deep beneath seas of your love

i'm walking backward

talking in circles

waving in running dark

i'm told to remember

re-writing and writing again

these backwards sounds

incapable

it stands in still wells

rising in reverse

running dryer in the rain

i'm doing it again and again

i'm doing it once more

just to burn the time in telling matters

head's fucked for the falling evening

always falling up and again

falling following down the sinking ship

down the stinking ship

down the mother fucking ship

and let 'er burn

live it once like your quarter-moon cigarettes

live it again just to save your immortality in pennies and pen caps

down the ship

down the ship

let 'er burn

i'm bitten

falling backward towards base connection

disintegration into nature

the knife in your back-pocket

stab stab

burn burn

kiss kiss

fuck it

i'm lovely in red furs and red eyes

living truths and eating lies

i'm returning to something

i'm turning into something

more powerful than even i could dream

it's 3:23 in the morning

and i'm waking to walking steps in my head

feeling the walls collapse

i am learning to make something

later i'll relive in memories and melodies

i'm learning to live, love, one level up

i'm burning down the fuckin forest

i'm building a new eco-system

of my psychotics and my neurotics

i'm walking out the burning building

and running in the rain

maybe this time i'll learn something

maybe i've been learning all along

head's floating off the ground

lookin in like directions

i'm giving you an infection

and i'm using words to poke your wounds

with wooden spears and pruning shears

and edible candy wrappers made for your amusement

i make phonecalls in midnight lighting

just to save myself the self-reciprocation

and maybe makes some more sense of the attachments on the walls

i'm watching you fall

i'm making the call

the bombs are fallin down like wrath

60's post impresso-fuck-you's

slivers in my stomach

drop it like heated faces and rages

far fetched and farther out

in fields of growing ash

like falling oil

and bullets of virtues

all up inside your skull

messed

mixed up

psychedelic murder of what was

once considered to be biding my time

and taking my mind to places it learned

to love to hate in hasty ways

i am up inside your head

i am up inside your skull

upside down and writing it out

so i can remember this tomorrow

with greying eyes just to prove

i am up inside your skull

tattooing poetry

like poison veins writhing inside needle eyes

murder psychedelic of painting murals

leaving impressions on your skull

who am i?

not him?

not that

not the living lull

the severance and payment

i'll love to live this for you

through viscous vision

shifting

vicariously

i can be the vessel

the spiral out of your head

into drumbeaten fractures

alcoholic nightmares

i am not that

i am nothing like that

i'll tell you a secret

i'll tell you something beautiful

i'm your mother fucking poison

i'm your mother fucking cure

killing rings in tightening slings

i'm wringing your neck for answers

like bastards floating in bath tubs

and murderers drowning in your skin

I'M YOUR FUCKING POISON

I'M YOUR FUCKING CURE

i'm everything you miss to miss

to miss it again like silent lullabies

dropped dead to driving beats

it leaves these sheets damp with wilting sex

and foreign horrors

make

this

your

epitaph

i'm

your

fucking

poison

i'm

your

fucking

cure

Residential pre-eminence

i killed the calling towers

to race to days i find in between

pages of novels that were never

printed properly

because sitting in the sun

it's like tanning with acid baths

driven by itself to oblivion

these frowns are reserved for elsewhere

banish the thoughts that eat me

love like the pysche

and live like my stubborn skin

my eyes dilate in rhythms that don't exist

i am here

i am not

chewing on my neuroses

like level love and values of grafted skin

i'm listening to the abstract rhymes of my favorite

fuck up poison meet me and make me move

like the nothing i believed in

with carried torches and current cracked cliches

i am

i am safe to the town

to the world

where my will was waking

with wonderful lovely

and syllables saved up to serve the self satisfaction

i am making this mean

mean nothing to the walls that i contain

inside my head

feed the dead love

and love it like little whispers

walking in whirlwinds

i am part of your tornadoes and your tomatoes

and your gardens of sex and sweet teeth

feed the eyes with the uses of absorbtion

i am something

It's an incapability

inescapably i fall

like lovely pedals

to pastel eyes

caught up in the disguise

i can be your everything

but i cannot be your always

i can be your dreams

but never your realities

love me like quiet fury

and i will love like the sun

I want to eat you up

silence stubborn syllables

of furious incarnation

infatuation with the idea

that it was less then lovely

above me

i watch the skies turn in parallel circles

parabolic murder of my emotions

because my mind is made of apologies

tis futile

like buried answers held low

you will never know

the reality i shoved in between my ribs

i am a child of perdition

waiting with fading patience

for the repetition to sweep in

like waves of plagues

and i'm already eating the soul of these pages

wake up to melting lights

i'm dying to get inside of your cracked skull

where i lie down these weary eyes

that compromise all of your conviction

smile

so i can feel the fury

of imminent decomposability

i make my lists in whispers

dropping to shattered jungles

where my heart lies in bio-degradation

it's finalized evolution

towards this solution

towards this pollution

i will bask in a false sense of sovereignty

i wanna drown in light

drown in love

in likely lust of consciousness

cross-hatched

my eyes stare into a million miles

floating before me like religion before the hopeless

lead me

out of disparity

fill my ears with vibrations

so that i might sleep without ever missing a beat

so i could eat my soul out

and bask in complacent uselessness

Arithmetic

the world shifts with turning wrists

my vision is skewed

cast in blue

with shades of red and brazen eyes

i prefer it this way

inch by inch i feel myself twist

becoming larger and smaller

insignificant Gods

folding into and upon myself

i see your face

turning with every movement of my lips

and my hands that cradle something beautiful

i see you without seeing you at all

i believe in love

i believe in a lot of things

i believe in less

but i believe in love

and i believe in words

words are weapons; my tools

my children, my bastard children of reason

i have no reason

i have no logic

no lover to coo my quietly

remind me that i am in control

i want none of it

why settle for the logical deduction

when i can feed this corruption

of strict articulation

it's not normality i seek

it's enlightenment

to deepest caves on my convulsing soul

it's here that love lies

like layers of dirt beneath my nails

it's here i learn to love you

maddeningly

and without restraint

whoever you are

whoever you were

whoever you will become

i will love you

like Lucifer loved God

Stars are amorphous

Flying past in blurs of color and light

You put me up here

lonely

amongst the stars

fighting for every breath

fighting against these jets

strapped and hardwired to my chest

it's all confusion

your beauty is like watching the sun implode

i'm blinded

and then you're gone

so i'm flying past stars of my own affection

chasing light of your love

i don't know what planet of insanity

that your love is taking me to

but i can't help but wonder

will you be there when i land?

i'm burning down wicker towers of my affection

trying to bleed out the infection

yet i seem addicted to the disease

the pretty plague painting red portraits

like murals of frustration

all over my body

i hate the face of temptation

too beautiful to be real

i want to break it into pieces

lay this place to waste

grow my jungle here

exist in isolation outside my head

away from you

slit fingertips are healing

shit-faced and strung out

heavy on days without sleep

i'm an addict to the graves i'm digging

begging for more than what can be spoken

the sky's gone beyond colors

it's furious

mad like my livid eyes staring at the burning

bed upon which i lie you down

i want to hurt you

so i'm gonna love you

i'm gonna devour you

i'm gonna make you mine

and kiss your neck

and drain your life

and love you

and hate you

and kill you

Silent "go fuck yourself" to reflection

there is not ideal perfection

despite my predilection for this insanity

i am sickened by my vanity

to think i'm immune

from the parasite i planted within myself

i love you

i'm going to kill you

because you're killing me

c'mon and let it go

c'mon and let me in

c'mon and light me up

so i can burn like your sins

there are prices to be paid

pound for pound

i weigh my flesh to see if it's adequate

tis not

will never be

I am still your dragging warrior

Your burning dagger

Conversation

This is an actual conversation I just had. My friend asked that i submit it into tatler. I'm instead putting it up here.

18:38Gabriel

hey

18:38Sarah

hi! whats up

18:39Gabriel

despite the stupid ass faces you're making, you all look really pretty in your profile pics

pic*

18:39Sarah

hahaha, thank you!

thats very sweet coming from you

since normally you and max just beat me to the ground

18:40Gabriel

aw you love me you know you do

18:41Sarah

maybe

how are you?

18:41Gabriel

i'm good

feeling weird

you?

18:42Sarah

why weird?

i'm alright

18:43Gabriel

why just alright?

18:43Sarah

i dont know.. i have just been thinking about things

18:43Gabriel

tlk to me babe

18:43Sarah

college and changes and growing up

and everything came so soon.. like everyone is leaving next year. and it's going to be difficult to adjust again, and even though it may be amazing i'm still going to miss high school i think

and seeing everyone

18:44Gabriel

mm

is it cuz 4th quarter just started?

18:45Sarah

no

i have been thinking this for a while now

i'm just sad that its all over

18:46Gabriel

nothing ever ends, love

18:46Sarah

explain

18:46Gabriel

i know that's not sound advice, but trust me when i tell you that this life you live, this life you love can never escape you so long as you never let go of its memory

and more importantly, if you never let go of how these memories make you feel

at the same time tho, the change is inevitable. it will come no matter what and there's nothing you can do to stop it.

18:47Sarah

but i dont want just memories.. i want to keep this

that's true

18:47Gabriel

what's the difference? your memories can be just as beautiful as the moments coming in real time

if anything

they can be even more beautiful

18:48Sarah

wow

that is so true

thank you

18:48Gabriel

as days go on and you hold onto the beautiful things that have happened, you can learn to appreciate them more, making them mean more to you

18:48Sarah

i guess i just see my future looming in the distance, because i can't control it, and i can't see it being better than anything is right now.. but that is just because i'm unsure of it

that is amazing advice.

but i need to look at it positively and let my life be lived

18:49Gabriel

exactly

don't worry about what will happen

worry about what is happening

love

what is happening

love it furiously and without hesitation or consequence

and learn

to love the memory

just as furiously as you love the moment

don't live in the past, and don't live in the future. neither will provide comfort

instead, live now with each passing pulse

cherish it

and take it with as you march forward to the horizon

Millstone

I like different life philosophies. Someone told me once that I was too young to have a philosophy that meant anything. I promptly told them to fuck off. Every experience that I have, every person I meet, every pulse of my heart is etching another mark into the stone, allowing me to learn something new. Any philosophy I follow comes from this belief.

What is odd is how different the philosophy I have currently adopted is from my past ideas. Tis as follows:

Highway System

My life is a single edifice. Four walls. A roof. A floor. On this landscape around me are billions of other buildings. With each experience I go through, I expand my edifice, building stories with each lesson learned. Around me and between the other buildings and I are highways. Lots and lots of highways. These highways run with cars and bikes and people and energy every day and every night without end or consequence. This highway system is life. This highway system is not my life, not your life, but life in general. My edifice, while encased within the system, is independent of the system. And, when time breaks down my building to dust, when I am nothing but a parking lot..... It won't matter. The highways around me will still run fast as if I never existed. My name will be etched in a granite slab. Nothing more and nothing less will be left behind. Those who loved me will see the granite slab, remember me hopefully, and the continue on building their structures to reach the heavens above. I could never want more than that.

One of my favorite movies called Memento has a quote: "The world doesn't disappear every time you close your eyes."

My life is inconsequential and my being is nothing but an insignificant speck in this universe. This does not scare me. It instead comforts me. I find solace in the knowledge that life will continue in spite of me and that this world is so much bigger than me.

I'm twisting

enveloping into myself

i am a fucking trainwreck in slowmotion

moving frames per second

in the caverns of your burning eyes

i can be whatever you want me to be

i can bend to your will

you just have to bleed fuel for me

find yourself in the dark

midnight sex made to be something cheap

made to be something bleak

made to be bright but not too beautiful

take the veil off the curtains

hugging the walls like jeans on drowned men

burn

burn

burn

I'm probably going to burn this in the end

just to prove a point to you and your majesty

Metallica

I really like Metallica. I liked Metallica before I considered metal a worthy genre. Someone told me they hated them because of the perfect 4:4 timing and the cyclic riffs. I think this is why I like it. It's perfect musical construction. It's fast. It's well written and well played. And, their best songs ALWAYS have a message.

Listen to these

Creeping Death - Ride the Lightning - about the Angel of Death, and the final plague over Egypt; inspired by the very old movie "The Ten Comandments."

Nothing Else Matters - Black Album

Ride the Lightning -Ride the Lightning - written to be seen as the final thoughts of a mentally insane death row criminal right before death.

Disposable Heroes - Master of Puppets - written about soldiers and how it effects them

One - And Justice For All... - written about Johnny Got His Gun; also written about how war effects soldiers.

Master of Puppets - Master of Puppets - written about how drugs can manipulate someone. Arguably about being a slave to control.